ON MY WAY AT LAST...

Its the night before the long trip and of course i'm up til 1:30am packing and doing last minute things before i travel tomorrow. Yes, the days have finally turned to hours and in just about 15 hours or so I'll be on the plane headed to Kenya. Not sure if it's actually hit me yet or not that I'm actually finally going...but i wanted to share with everyone some of my thoughts....

Read, from the Journals of Jim Elliot:
"Last day in Portland. The past week has been very busy-full of visits and interruptions while packing. But God has been good and exceedingly loving-kind toward me. The saints have given unhesitantly at every turn and every need has been met-even beyond the need. It is as in the wilderness, "For the stuff they had was sufficient for all the work to make it, and too much" (Exod. 36:7). Pete will arrive today, and we will drive to Williams tomorrow, Lord in your will. That will be the first step away. It is hard to say goodbey, but, as Pete wrote yesterday, "the hand is on the plow." I have had difficulty keeping spiritual pace these last days. Rushing through prayer and scanning the Word only this is no way to have confidence in the soul. Still God is gracious. We change, He changes not; Our Christ can never die. His love, not ours, the resting place, His truth, not mine, the tie."

Just a few weeks ago my dear friend Julie handed me a peace of paper with those words from Jim Elliot's journal and just this morning i read them over and over realizing that those words sum up what life has been like the last few weeks. So I wanted to share with you some of what i wrote in my own journal....

Jim Elliot said it just perfect first in the fact that my friends and family, (the saints) have given of themselves in so many ways over and beyond what I have needed. God has been so good!! What a gracious provider HE IS!! And yes the last few weeks have been full of visits and saying "see you later" to friends and family. I have thoroughly enjoyed every minute I've been able to spend with them all!! And yes even for a short four months its not easy to hug necks go seperate ways but Go i must! And yes in the busyness and sickness of the last few weeks its been hard keeping the spiritual pace. But God, HE has still been gracious!! Its very evident that this Christian life is not about a works based gospel or I woul have failed miserably. Its only by God's grace that He's brought me this far and only by HIS grace that I even live, breathe, and remain "sane" most of the time! He never changes and remains faithful even when we change and are "faith-less" God doesn't force us to spend intimate time with HIM, HE lovingly asks us to draw near to HIM! He asks us to be dependent and not independent! Its hard to believe that that tomorrow I will be on the plane headed to Kenya. I am so excited and praise God for the peace and calmness of heart that I've had in the last few days as i prepare to go. I know that that peace that i can't explain only comes from the Lord. (i know many have been praying that for me). The time has come that I've been waiting for since February--and wow my mind can't begin to think about all that has happened since then to make this journey tomorrow finally happen. God has been so good and so faithful! And now here I go off on another "adventure" with the Lord..Off to many unknowns of what its going to be like this time and what's going to happen in the next 4 months. This is yet another opportunity to step out in faith trusting the Lord completely!! May the Lord help me trust HIM! I am so excited to finally be going and excited about seeing Dennis again after 7 months of long distance communication since his visit in December. (ok i know many may not know Dennis and I's story but that is to be written on the blog soon so stay tuned). And excited about meeting the college girls after they return from semester break. And excited about hopefully seeing old friends. I'm just all around excited and can't wait to see what the Lord has planned!!